29 Mar
In a divorce action due to abuse, is the abuser entitled to alimony?
Posted in motor vehicle accident on 29.03.11
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Hello!
I am in the process of filing for divorce from my wife, who has been severely abusive. Before you step back and say "Whoa!", I was severely injured by a motor vehicle accident and she took advantage of my incapacitation. I was physically unable to run, unable to fight back or defend myself, unable to call for help, and kept physically dependent on her. It was determined by the State and their professionals that she has a personality disorder, of which I was unaware of at the time of our marriage.
For the welfare of myself, and to hasten the return of the children (toddlers) removed by Children’s Protective Services, I obtained a restraining order against her and had her removed from the home. Prior to receipt of the restraining order, I was subjected to at least 35 instances of physical abuse (assault) and two instances where I was almost killed by her temper. I was subjected to all types of abuse: verbal, emotional, mental, and physical! I was even deprived of life maintenance medications at a very critical period in my life.
Perhaps the lawyer I am retaining is preparing me for the worst, or maybe he is overly consumed by her rights, but he has spoken on many occassions of my having to provide any of several types of alimony. Personally, had she not become abusive and almost killed me (and therefore having become a threat to the health, safety, and welfare of the kids) the marriage would not be ending in divorce.
Bottom line, looking more for factual instances than opinion, is/has the abusive partner in a marriage entitled to any form of alimony in a divorce proceeding?
Thank you for your assistance!
Sorry I did not include this in the original post. This is the same lawyer representing me in the CPS action, he is intimately familiar with the details in this case. As a result of the injuries and to aid the return of the children, I took retirement and am limited by income, handicaps, and the fact that I have the kids (at the moment) 24/7/365 and she has visitation rights [:-(]!
2 comments on this topic
29. March - 7:24 pm
I would ask and discuss with my attorney..what legal rights I have in DV related divorce, where there is abuse from one spouse.
29. March - 7:24 pm
That is something that will have to be determined by the judge. It will bepend on what state law are where you live. I am not a lawyer. Your lawyer should be able to give you a better answer unless you have some one on here that is in the legal profession to answer that for you.
29. March - 7:24 pm
What is legal and what is right are not always the same. If you were married a long time and you make a lot more than her, then maybe so.
That is totally unfair and bull crap, but still may be so.
I am in the midst of divorcing someone who likely has NPD, but being a jerk isn’t against the law so our son will be with him half the time, being yelled at and smothered and made to wait on his royal highness.
That stinks too, but again, what’s right and what’s legal are two different things. I hope your lawyer puts up a good fight. You need that money for your kids.
29. March - 7:24 pm
I don’t think so, but consult a different attorney and find out what he has to say. You don’t have to stay with your original attorney, you can get a new one if you feel that he isn’t do a great job for you. Remember he works for you, not the other way around. You can go to the library and look up things in a law books so you have some idea of whats ahead.
29. March - 7:24 pm
I would fight tooth and nail to make sure she doesn’t get a dime. She abused you- why should she get spousal support? If I were you, I’d take her for everything she has. That’s the same thing I’d tell a woman in an abusive relationship. Alimony shouldn’t be awarded based on gender.